I got my 4 legged babies from a guy I briefly lived with. He would soon turn me off the more I gotten to know him. He had a female cat that he said he originally wanted to breed. She was 99% black Egyptian. Looking up Egyptian cats and you will see that black ones are not the most desirable and are usually only used for breeding and not as show cats. The shows only want to see the spots so the black cat gets disregarded. Instead, she went around breeding with other cats in the neighborhood. I don’t think that’s how breeding a pure bread works, but ok.

About Egyptian Mau

The guy I was with lived in a trailer park and the cat was an indoor/outdoor cat. There was a batch of kittens before my babies and he wouldn’t care for them. He would make statements such as wanting to shoot them off as target practice. I did consider of taking one for myself but I was still in my apartment at the time, no pets. I believe the one kitten had a silver coat that I thought could look a bit blue. I even thought of a name for it! They had the markings of Egyptian Mau cats. That batch would all eventually be killed by neighbors cars etc. Well, so much for taking the one cat. It was sad hearing that they all died. Also it was disturbing that he didn’t care and happy that they didn’t make it.

Besides his questionable reactions towards his pure bread cat having babies with the neighborhoods unspaded cats, I still stuck around and eventually moved in with him. I wanted to try and quit dancing, basically so my parents can be happy and the arguments can stop. I can become the good citizen they always wanted me to be. I was going to take a hit with my income trying to work a “normal” job and I was hooking up with this guy I met from the furniture store so, I decided to move in with him and we can combine incomes. He also wanted someone to split the bills with him. When my lease was up, we moved me in with him.

Cats are pregnant for 3 months, then they have babies. There’s no waiting period, a female cat can become pregnant soon after giving birth. They can have 4 sets of babies a year. He had this female cat and he kept one male black cat that she had. Apparently, I believe she mated with her son. The results were two who would become my own.

On about December 2, 1999, she gave birth to 4 black kittens. Three females and one male. The kittens were born under the bathroom sink cabinet. The kittens could have been born anywhere between the 1st and second of December though. I noted it as December 2nd, that’s when I found her and the babies. I laid a towel next to her because the floor underneath that cabinet wasn’t exactly clean and I was hoping she’d move them off that disgusting floor onto it. His bathroom needed some work to be done to it.

At this point in time, I was already getting fed up with him and began sleeping in the back room. All my stuff and my bed was put in the back spare room. The trailer was a two bedroom and he had the middle room. I can’t recall hanging my posters up in that room. I thought they were safer not being hung up. Sorry Billy, my love!

The one female fur was different from the other three. He wanted to call her Fuzzy. I’m saying things like, ewe, no. That’s horrible! I decided to come up with a name for her. I thought of Misty. She was the first one named. I originally nicknamed the other two females as Midnight and Shadow and the male was just hey little boy. I ran out of ideas and didn’t think I needed to name them if they were going to have new homes. He didn’t want them and I already decided to keep Misty and find the other 3 homes, before he decided to shoot them off with his gun.

I feared Misty was going to be rejected by her mother because she had that appearance about her being the “special needs” kitten that would be left for dead in the wild. She was not pooping properly. I took them all to the vet to make sure they were healthy and I was directed to wipe her butt frequently, because her mother wasn’t doing it. I had to take special care of Misty to make sure she was growing and developing. I don’t recall if I had to bottle feed her like Sam, a cat we had when I was a teenager. I believe I was lucky her mother still allowed her to nurse. I don’t want to confuse the memory of her and Sam. I believe she just wasn’t being groomed by her mother and I even bathe her in the sink a few times.

We were handling the kittens early on. All four of them took a liking to me. The kittens would soon be in my room. I even gotten a litter Pan and placed it in my room closet. Their mother used it and naturally they also started using the litter box. I was happy that they learned from their mother. I wish I could have taken all four of them.

There was a woman I knew that took the two sisters for her mom. She even told me the one was named Lucky and I was like, NOOOOOOOO! How could you name such cool cats Lucky?

Before I left this guy I was living with, he did offer me that if I leave, I can take the mother cat because he knows I would give her a better home then what he did. I never took her because I knew I was going to have some issues with the two I was taking with me to my parents house.


After the one cat we had, Sam, died, my parents never wanted another pet. Sam was only about 4 when he passed away. He had some health issues and was a runt. The size he grew to was equivalent to a 6 month old cat. I was 18 when he left us. We figured it was probably about April/May 1995 when he was put down.

Sam and his family were found underneath our deck in the Summer of 1991. His mother wasn’t feeding him and was going to have him die off. We took him in and bottle fed him. He came around when my father was going through a hard time in his life with having a massive heart attack. Sam was his little animal healer. Sam kept my father company during a hard time in his life.

Sam developed cancer and it was eating him alive. Anytime he ate it was like feeding the cancer, not Sam. Years later I would wonder if it was the litter we used or the food he ate. I read not good things with the clumping litter we used, Scoop Away and I would avoid using it for my own cats.

My parents vowed to never have another pet. They didn’t like the emotional attachment and then them dying. I believe that’s what it basically was. After reading about Narcissism, I can see how this is reflective in this decision. There’s been no animals since Sam.


It was maybe about five years after Sam, Im bringing back 2 kittens home with me. When I returned back home to my parents house, they weren’t too thrilled that I brought back cats. Originally, the male cat was going to a new home. My parents accepted that I was trying to find a home for the one cat. Eventually, the lady I was talking to who was going to take him, decided not too. I never named him because he wasn’t going to stay with me. I would just call him little boy. But this boy, would follow me around. I kept thinking he was like my Shadow. His sister now had a different name and a new home, so when the lady decided to not take him, it’s the name I gave him. I believe he chose me anyway. Me and my Shadow.


My parents didn’t want the cats roaming the house. They wanted them to stay in my room. I felt that was cruel, the room was small for two cats and I let them roam anyway when they weren’t around. This is where Misty started being scared of other people, or she became more reserved. I let them roam the house and when I seen my parents arrive, I’d pick them up and put them back in my room. She would start to naturally hide from other people. As soon as she heard another person, she’d run and hide.

Eventually I figured out I was going to school for Video Production at the Art Institute. They had loans and I didn’t need to have taken the SATs. With me having been in special education. I was exempted from those types of tests in high school. So I never took them and had no interest in taking them. I did have to take a placement testing though. Anything you scored low on, you had to take a basic refresher class.

I started school in the Summer 2000. My degree was an associate of science in Video Production. I would complete this course in Winter 2002 but then stayed for a Bachelor of Science in Digital Media Production. I would graduate in the Summer of 2005, with honors!


Apparently, my cat Misty got knocked up, as I assumed from her brother. I don’t know how else. They must have been 3 months. She had kittens by 6 months of age. Knowing cats take 3 months from conception to birth, she gave birth on the first day of summer. I think I did try to have them as indoor/outdoor cats because of my parents not wanting them in the house. So, maybe there was another cat. But all her babies had black fur. Their fur were just like hers, “fuzzy”. All 5 of them!

When my parents found out she was pregnant and I was being scolded about it, they told me she’s not having them in the house. It was cruel how they were. She had them outside. I couldn’t get a good look at Misty but one day I did and it wasn’t a pretty site. She had maggots all underneath her. I went calling around for vets because it may have been Sunday and many places weren’t open. I eventually found a animal hospital a bit away with emergencies. The local vet only took appointments and I wasn’t waiting around. I was only able to find 3 of the babies. I took her and the babies to the emergency vet hospital.

Misty was shaved underneath and her one leg for IV. The vet told me she can’t continue to nurse them, it also appears she lost a nipple. Her underside was all exposed. I didn’t know what to do. I was still talking to Joi and she took the babies and fed them. I was trying to care for Misty and work and also school was starting soon. I was not happy with how my parents were in this entire situation. They didn’t care and Misty was to stay in the porch during healing.

It turns out Joi kept the one kitten and felt he was strong and would be a good mouser for their small farm. I found a home for one of them with a girl from work and she told me she named her Precious. I completely forgotten with the third one. I believe Joi may have found a home for the third one. The other two, we’re never found and their bodies have probably been decomposing underneath my parents deck all these years. We all agreed that Misty was probably moving her kittens from one place to another for some reason. Sad knowing that they were left for dead.

Long story short because of too much time passing for exact recall, Misty did eventually heal. Her underside needed to close up and that took time. I learned the white patch on her underside was actually a birthmark. The color of her skin was dark in that area, black. Shadow was first to get spaded at 6 months, right before the babies were born. I had to wait for Misty to heal before she was fixed. I know Misty had trauma from being at my parents house.


Please note: If you’d ask my mother, they never kicked me out a second time. I completely fabricated everything after this point. My mom also said she never gave me an ultimatum of going to school and living under their roof. I believe this has an actual term called gaslighting but as usual I’m wrong and probably making that up as well. This all happened during yet another spat in early 2022. Because as she use to tell me,”your mother is always right” which implies I’m always wrong. Im also sure at this point, I probably made that up as well. Im a complete liar. Ok. Im a complete liar! So, maybe we could also say, no, I never loved Billy Corgan. That’s a complete lie as well. I don’t love him and my intentions were to always cause harm to him because I fucking hate him! And no, I did not just cried typing that. I’m an emotionless bitch. I felt nothing for him, EVER!

I actually went away for the week with my spiritual community. They went every year to a camp. I left my cats with a friend. I believe I left them with Robin. I had my video camera and captured some footage as well to use for school. It was a great and fun week with my new spiritual like minded friends. The moment I came back home and stepped in the door though, there they were, my parents, ready to grill me.

It wasn’t that they even found out that I was dancing but that my moms younger sisters second husband found some pictures that I had done previously. They just assumed I was dancing again, which I was but still. Those pictures weren’t current. Again, it was August, and I was really starting to hate August. My parents would have me kicked out again a month after I already started school. At least they couldn’t make a threat to take my car away.

I found a friend who I knew growing up and he offered me to stay with him. It was a crazy time because I was in school full time. It wasn’t was easy juggling my schedule, and trying to work and caring for my cats that may seemed to have been a burden. During my stay there for about 2 months, I’ve noticed Misty would go in hiding. She would only come out when I was around.

Me and the one male friend started having a falling out. He would get upset over minor things and I’m trying to work and go to school. I would drop to part time for school the next quarter (October-December) and found a new place to stay at in the city. It was a small group of people that went to my school looking for a roommate. Everyone split the money to stay there. My cats were with me and I was told the same about Misty. Misty would hide and they never seen her. I would only be there for about a month because I finally had down payment money for my own apartment. They offered to take Shadow if I wanted to give him up. Of course, I couldn’t do that to him.


Now, I was happy that I had my own place again. It was a great feeling. I had my one bedroom apartment in South Philadelphia and I would be there for 5 years.

Even though I was kicked out a second time, I did not cut my parents off. I still remained in contact. I feel better when I can distance myself and spend time with them on occasion rather then live with them. I was still going to school when I got my own place again. I felt such a relief having my own space again. No body to enter my space and it was just me and my fur babies.


Shadow died on October 11, 2010.

Misty died November 16, 2015, the same day Augustus was born.